My mom is a felon
My mom is a felon.
This isn't something you know when you see me, or even when you get to know me. But its something that effects my day to day life.
When it was my last day of fourth grade my mom dropped me off at school like any other normal day. My dad (THANK GOD FOR HIM) picked me up, which perplexed me because I don't remember it being his weekend to get me. It was his weekend for the rest of my life.
My mom went away that day for years; 4 to be exact. My life altered in ways that one honestly can't imagine. She missed things that moms are supposed to be there for. Milestones that girls hit from 4th grade till 9th. If it wasn't for my dad's true heroic behavior I wouldn't be half the person I am today. HE was the one who got me my first pads, and books to go along with it to make up for his lack of womanly knowledge. HE was the one who met my first love, and walked my down the aisle for my last one. HE was the one who watched me fail at gymnastics, try out for cheerleading and make it(courtesy of my loud mouth). HE was my mom and dad.
Then she got out, tried to live a normal life like the rest of us. We let her back in eargerly with hearts and arms wide open. And when I say eagerly I mean let her back in screaming and shaking and crying with excitement to catch her up with all the things your mom has missed in your life and ready to live the rest of your life with her by your side, eagerly. If you know anything about mental illness, you know it never goes away, especially if one doesn't recognize it in themselves and seek help. See "bipolar" in dictionary.
My summer between high school and college she went back to prison again. I haven't seen her since. Numb would be the best word to describe when she called me and told me she was going back. That phone call is etched in my brain and filed away under top five numb, but equally painful, memories of my life.
I VOWED to be the best mother that day to my future children. That drive it put inside of me propelled me forward day by day. Propelled me forward to meeting my husband, graduating college, marrying my husband, moving to a wonderful new city, becoming a teacher. I was doing all of this to become the best mom I could possibly be and create a family that I longed for and my daddy taught me we were all supposed to have.
The day I realized I wouldn't have kids naturally I was teaching the sweetest little first graders ever. Then it hit me. That drive that kept me going, the fire I had burning inside of me, the desire I couldn't wait to fulfill, wouldn't be. Immediately I walked over to my teammate (only a handful of people in my life get me like her) and I LITERALLY collapsed into her. "I won't be the mom I've been living my life to be. My purpose is gone."
Then I remembered my Daddy. He didn't miss a thing in my life. He was there for every cheerleading game. There for every broken heart and every crush. He was there for every good grade, and SOMETIMES bad grades. He was there when I lied and said I had extra work after school and he was waiting in the detention room for me with my teacher. He was there with tape over my toothpaste proving me wrong when I said "Of course I brushed my braces at summer camp". He was there for my wedding, my move, my breakdown phone calls.
I found a new purpose. To be half the parent my Dad was to me.
My mom is a felon but...
My dad is a life saver.
This isn't something you know when you see me, or even when you get to know me. But its something that effects my day to day life.
When it was my last day of fourth grade my mom dropped me off at school like any other normal day. My dad (THANK GOD FOR HIM) picked me up, which perplexed me because I don't remember it being his weekend to get me. It was his weekend for the rest of my life.
My mom went away that day for years; 4 to be exact. My life altered in ways that one honestly can't imagine. She missed things that moms are supposed to be there for. Milestones that girls hit from 4th grade till 9th. If it wasn't for my dad's true heroic behavior I wouldn't be half the person I am today. HE was the one who got me my first pads, and books to go along with it to make up for his lack of womanly knowledge. HE was the one who met my first love, and walked my down the aisle for my last one. HE was the one who watched me fail at gymnastics, try out for cheerleading and make it(courtesy of my loud mouth). HE was my mom and dad.
Then she got out, tried to live a normal life like the rest of us. We let her back in eargerly with hearts and arms wide open. And when I say eagerly I mean let her back in screaming and shaking and crying with excitement to catch her up with all the things your mom has missed in your life and ready to live the rest of your life with her by your side, eagerly. If you know anything about mental illness, you know it never goes away, especially if one doesn't recognize it in themselves and seek help. See "bipolar" in dictionary.
My summer between high school and college she went back to prison again. I haven't seen her since. Numb would be the best word to describe when she called me and told me she was going back. That phone call is etched in my brain and filed away under top five numb, but equally painful, memories of my life.
I VOWED to be the best mother that day to my future children. That drive it put inside of me propelled me forward day by day. Propelled me forward to meeting my husband, graduating college, marrying my husband, moving to a wonderful new city, becoming a teacher. I was doing all of this to become the best mom I could possibly be and create a family that I longed for and my daddy taught me we were all supposed to have.
The day I realized I wouldn't have kids naturally I was teaching the sweetest little first graders ever. Then it hit me. That drive that kept me going, the fire I had burning inside of me, the desire I couldn't wait to fulfill, wouldn't be. Immediately I walked over to my teammate (only a handful of people in my life get me like her) and I LITERALLY collapsed into her. "I won't be the mom I've been living my life to be. My purpose is gone."
Then I remembered my Daddy. He didn't miss a thing in my life. He was there for every cheerleading game. There for every broken heart and every crush. He was there for every good grade, and SOMETIMES bad grades. He was there when I lied and said I had extra work after school and he was waiting in the detention room for me with my teacher. He was there with tape over my toothpaste proving me wrong when I said "Of course I brushed my braces at summer camp". He was there for my wedding, my move, my breakdown phone calls.
I found a new purpose. To be half the parent my Dad was to me.
My mom is a felon but...
My dad is a life saver.
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