My diagnosis

POF

When you google just that the dating website "plenty of fish" comes up.  Let me tell ya'll that is scarier then the kind of POF I have.  (In my opinion)

Premature Ovarian Failure.

Premature ovarian failure is defined as the cessation of menstrual periods before the age of 40. It occurs in 1 in 1,000 women between the ages of 15 and 29 and 1 in 100 women between the ages of 30 and 39. The average age of onset is 27 years.

Daddy always said I've been an over achiever.  Beat that 27 years by 1 year...26!
The next results showed my FSH to be in the 165 and my LH to be 112.  Not to mention my estrogen was only 7.7.  This meant the hard truth.  It was me.  My ovaries failed. POF.
At first I was scared.  Scared of what that meant for my chances of being a mother, seeing as how I now only have a 5% of ever conceiving naturally.  Scared that I would be battling dementia, osteoporosis, diabetes, and tons of other illness at a much younger age.  Scared that I would be looked at like I was weird.  Waittttt...I am already looked at like that...hehe!
Most of all I was scared that I was alone and no one would understand me.  Loneliness is my biggest fear.  Being left out of things, being all alone, feeling lonely, those are the worst things to me. My biggest fear was now the rest of my life...the walls started to close in on me.
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*panic attack coming*
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 "AND I WILL BE TO HER A WALL OF FIRE ALL AROUND, DECLARES THE LORD, AND I WILL BE THE GLORY IN HER MIDST." Zechariah 2:5


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